Talking to Your Kids About War
a few resources for parents, teachers, and caregivers
The web is full of good resources. Here are a few to consider.
Feel free to add your own recommended resources.
Talking to Your Kids About War
(link removed, article no longer at that site.)
By Amy Morin, a Licensed Social Worker and Editor-in-Chief of Verywell Mind.
(This list is very similar to UNICEF's seen below in this topic.)
Highlights:
- Strike up a conversation
- Ask what they have heard
- Explain the "purpose" of war (which some people believe is to protect the good and punish the bad)
- Hold back when necessary. Address what they've heard but don't get into the gruesome details.
- Don't engage in harmful stereotypes (such as, "as ______ are bad").
- Limit media viewing in your home and discuss as needed what they are hearing/seeing
- Point out the good, encourage compassion
- Keep watch for distress
How to Talk to Your Kids About War (Age by Age)
https://www.gominno.com/parent...your-kids-about-war/
By Melanie Rainer. Includes scriptures and perspective by child's age. A thoughtful discussion from a Director of Ministry in a local church and mother of young children.
Highlights:
- Don’t pretend war doesn’t exist.
- Reassure kids of God’s character.
- Teach them how to respond with grace and love.
- Remind them that one day, there will be no more war.
- Pray with your kids (for strength, understanding, not to be afraid)
10 tips for parents and teachers of elementary school children in a time of war
From the American Psychological Association's website: https://www.apa.org/topics/resilience/kids-war
Highlights:
- Talk to your children
- Watch for signs of distress
- Limit exposure to media
- Reduce daily stresses and keep to routines
- Assure them of their safety (children don't always know "where" war is happening)
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An Explanation for Children of the Israeli-Palestinian Conflict
A short, easy to understand video for kids created by the Canadian Broadcasting Company
https://youtu.be/cphJJZQtx-U?si=Fg6lg65xzAM2Ep_g
Balanced, doesn't take sides. Begs the question, "How will they resolve their competing claims?" -- which is an excellent question to ask kids. You may also want to ask, "Until there's a solution, what SHOULDN'T they do to make things worse?" The story of Jacob and Esau should be helpful here! How not to make conflict worse is a life skill, as is reconciling like Jacob and Esau did.
UNICEF's 8 Tips for Talking to Children About War
UNICEF is the world's most respected children's well-being agency. A branch of the UN, they go into some of the toughest places on earth to advocate for the safety and health of children.
Here are their 8 tips for talking to children about war
- Find out what they know or have heard. Listen.
- Keep it calm and age-appropriate. Young children often need more emotional support than words.
- Spread compassion, not stigma (hate, prejudice, "bad" people).
- Focus on the helpers. Lift up stories of help. Take action.
- Reduce their anxiety and leave them in a state of care not distress.
- Continue to check in and measure stress. Watch for adverse reactions in other contexts that might signal an underlying worry or fear.
- Limit the flood of new. Turn of the TV.
- Take care of yourself (employ all 8 tips for yourself!)
Let's add to all these lists: "Do Something Constructive and Helpful"
- Raise and send money to UNICEF or your favorite denomination's relief fund.
- Remember the children of war in your prayers.
- Help children identify points of conflict within their own family and friendships and make a plan to reduce the stress and heal.
- Give children in your home small chores, such as, collecting unused clothing and canned goods and taking them to deliver these goods to a local shelter or food bank.
- Your great idea here!
